Do you know what real criticism is ?

Hello guys !

As a big-mouthed, outspoken girl, this subject has always been on the back of my mind but luckily, my mama raised me right and I know when to shut it. I know that my opinion cannot be universal and I also know that I won’t agree with everything that people out there say. So, I’ve been thinking, when do I voice my opinion and most importantly, how do I do so? 

Today’s post was going to be a whole other topic, but as I was coming back home, it hit me, why not talk about Criticism because as I see things, there’s a fine line between criticizing and bullying, and I swear to God some people don’t know how to walk it or don’t want to learn how to, so I thought why not share my little insight on the subject?

Let's talk about ... Criticism

Dear citizens of the world, please know the difference between constructive criticism and being straight up mean to people. Since I’ve become a blogger, I’ve seen only the good side of this community, because it IS mostly good, I’ve never cam across insulting comments or anything of that kind but I’m not naive, I KNOW that it exists and I know that some fellow bloggers have experienced the stupidity of some people. So, as the nice person that I am -or nah haha- I’ve come to help the confused folks. Here’s how it goes:

Is your comment 100% necessary ?

And by comment, I don’t mean just the virtual kind, I’m talking about life in general. If you are opening your mouth to criticize someone’s appearance, beliefs, likes or dislikes, just do us all a favor and shut your fucking trap. Does said person’s life have any kind of influence on yours? No? I thought so! So why in heaven’s name do you overstep and interfere?

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On the other hand, if it is some destructive behavior or a subject up for discussion, potentially opening up a civilized debate that’s when I say, why the heck not voice your opinion? Just …

Know the right way to do it.

Don’t be rude, please. I’ll even come to your rescue and show you some of the sentences that you shouldn’t use, like EVER :

“What the hell? I can’t believe you love that -Insert book, artist, song, whatever. You’re just stupid!”

“Why are you wearing THAT?”

Or the classic: “You’re ugly! ” WHY OH WHY? I’ll kick your butt, mean person.

“You shouldn’t even exist if you think this or that.”

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THAT’S FREAKING BULLIYING. Again, KNOW THE DIFFERENCE. Instead, you can say:

“I respect your beliefs but can you elaborate on this?”

“I’d like to understand why you think what you think,  I’m really curious to know more.”

“I can see what you love that, but it just doesn’t do it for me”

And avoid talking about appearance, that’s just shallow, okay? It says more about the person you are that about the person you’re criticizing.

Here’s a little anecdote: Last summer, I had one of the best conversations of my life with two girls who didn’t share my culture nor my beliefs. They were vacationing in Morocco and had come from the US. I just randomly met them in the streets. They just came up to me and asked: “You dress really cool, you have kind of an American vibe to your style, do you speak English?” when I said yes, they started asking about places to visit and one thing led to the other, they started asking questions about my culture, my religion and I did the same with them, I learned SO MUCH from that. Imagine if they were rude, or if I were. It wouldn’t have been pleasant for neither of us.

Instead, focus on the positive.

I swear, it won’t cost you a cent to be nice to people, neither will it pull some muscle in your body and it can basically make that person’s day.

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You don’t know what battles they’re fighting, what demons they’re facing, what nightmares keep them up at night. Some people have it harder than others and don’t even show it. By being mean, you’re just making it harder on them, adding unnecessary weights. If you have nothing nice to say or don’t know how to formulate your sentences to sound decent just shut up, it’ll do you wonders. Also, some people can just brush it off and others can’ get past that one upsetting comment. So, I’m begging you, there’s always something good in everyone, talk about that, okay ? You can always say:

“I like that outfit you’re wearing today”

“You have a great smile”

“I like talking and discussing ideas with you”

And if you can’t find anything, just smile.

Okay, I’ll stop here because I’m rambling and I don’t even know if I got anyone to understand this bunch of non-sense haha. But if it helps anyone, just one person, I’m glad I could be of use.


That’s it until next time

What are your thoughts on Criticism ?

Hope you enjoyed, write to you soon.

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25 thoughts on “Do you know what real criticism is ?

  1. Being nice is nice. And I hate when people just bash on things for no reason, just for the purpose of being mean. I really hate that. If you’re being nice, or explaining why you don’t like it with reason, then it’s okay. BE NICE, it’s GREAT TO BE NICE ❤
    All of that to say, I love this post ahah ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  2. This is soooo true! People sometimes forget there’s a huge difference between stating or asking things politely than full on bashing. I really hate when people do that, it’s like they forget that other people have feelings as well and they ought to respect it no matter how different your beliefs are.
    Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Well said!

    One of my favorite things about adulthood: I’m less emotionally susceptible to awful people, and it’s easier to cut those people out of my life. I had really thin skin as a kid, and when your classmates are terrible, you can’t just stop attending school. Three cheers for growing up. =)

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I think the word criticism is the wrong word because sometimes it’s good to be a critical thinker and to be able to have a healthy debate. Obviously people who are just straight up rude and ignorant are simply assholes but they are always going to exist. I hate it when people are just rude for not real reason at all- it’s bloomin’ annoying! But that’s life I guess.

    Liked by 1 person

    • No no that’s the word I wanted to use because some people confuse being mean with being critical, I mentioned that criticism is good when it can open up discussions and debates. Yeah we gotta co-exist with that species haha.

      Like

  5. This is such a great post and I definitely agree with your points. I don’t really understand why people would go to the effort of writing a comment if it’s going to be something mean, it’s just another form of bullying. I always try and be careful of what I write both in comments on other peoples posts but also in replies to comments I get on my own. Everyone’s entitled to their own opinions.
    But anyways I loved reading this post! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Ahh, great post Fadwa! I am so, so bad when it comes to handling criticism. It genuinely terrifies me 🙈 And I think that’s because a lot of the criticism I’ve had to deal with has tend to be more on the insulting side. It’s a shame that so many people don’t understand the term of constructive criticism because I feel like it can be really helpful when given correctly.

    I will also never understand why people go out of their way to be deliberately mean! Like, do they honestly have nothing better to do?

    A lot of people need to stop and think and remember that we’re all in different situations and places. If everyone was just a bit kinder and accepting, it would make such a huge difference!

    Liked by 1 person

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