#DiverseBookBloggersDiscuss: Finding the invisible marginalisations?

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What makes me marginalized is invisible. For the most part. That makes it easier for me to “blend” into what people consider to be the norm and be “accepted” by my peers. At least, it would if I wasn’t vocal about what makes me different. But these different types of marginalizations make me realize how little intersectionality there was in publishing as I was growing up, how much it has grown, and what we can hope for in the future. Continue reading

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MUSLIM VOICES RISE UP – Navigating mental illness as Muslims

5- Navigating Mental Illness

Salaams friends,

Welcome to Muslim Voices Rise Up, a month-long project taking place during Ramadan where Muslim authors and bloggers share their experiences on various topics. This project is dedicated to centering Muslim experiences and showcasing the diversity within our own narratives. You can find more info, along with other blog posts for this project, on the introduction post. I am so incredibly excited to share today’s post, because it’s actually one I took part in. I was joined by a few of my Muslim sisters to talk all things navigating our mental illnesses as Muslims. This is the most I’ve ever shared about my mental illnesses talking to anyone…ever and the experience was incredible. Especially because of the fact that I was talking to people who could truly understand my experiences.

CW: Talk of mental illnesses, depression, anxiety, PTSD, anorexia, suicide, hospitalization, sexual assault.

Continue reading

Hello Anxiety, my old friend. – #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth

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Hello friends!

Since I started my blog, especially in the past year or so, I’ve talked in length about my anxiety, most times in wrap ups, sometimes in random posts when it felt relevant but I have never dedicated a post to it and so that’s what we’re doing today. Why, you ask? Because 1/ It’s Mental Health Awareness Month and 2/ my anxiety has been getting worse the past couple weeks or so after being very manageable and almost forgettable since mid-January. And let me tell you. No matter how many lows I have after a high, the lows will always fucking suck. There’s really no getting used to them. Continue reading

Let’s be Candid – Where I’ve Been

 

Life update

Hello friends !

You may have noticed, you probably haven’t, but this summer my blogging wasn’t the best. In fact, it was absolutely shit (for what I’m used to doing, I mean, not in a general sense, all blogging is good blogging, but yeah…moving on). I wasn’t consistent at all, barely wrote any posts, didn’t blog-hop or reply to comments AT ALL. And I’m gonna let you on on a secret, this is the first non-review post I write since mid-june, I didn’t even post July nor August wrap-up.

And since I’ve always been pretty transparent on this blog, I thought I should keep that up and tell you a little bit about what has been going on. This won’t be a very cheery post, and if you’re only here for the book content, I don’t blame you, you can skip it and come back for the three book related posts going up later this week! I’ve been debating whether of not to write this post for over a week now but I feel like it’s important, mental illnesses are so stigmatized and we’re made to feel ashamed of them when they just are what they are and we don’t need to hide them. I also wanted all of you to know that I’m not always perky and happy and that if you’re not either, then you’re not alone.

TW: depression and anxiety.

In June, I sank into a very bad depressive episode. Not life threatening, but bad. My anxiety was also the worst isn’t ever been with intrusive thoughts, daily panic attacks and being on the verge of them 24/7. 2018 has been a pretty mentally taxing year for me, I won’t go into too much detail about it because it’s very personal and no matter how open I am on here, some things I still keep to myself. But the gist of it is that I saw the breakdown coming from miles away, it was only a matter of when and what would trigger it, the last straw if you will. Which is what explains my lack of blogging. I struggled to find motivation to do anything, even the things I love and that bring my joy didn’t sound appealing anymore. I didn’t blog, didn’t draw, barely read, and struggled to get out of bed most days. I couldn’t even find the energy to take care of myself, let alone do anything that requires additional energy.

And then when I thought I had started getting better, something happened while I was in Italy that got me right back to square one. Not gonna lie, putting myself back together was one of the hardest things to do, I’m the type of person who is functional as long as I have structure to my days, no matter how bad my mental health gets, that keeps me going. So being on summer break and having nothing to do made doing anything ten times harder than it would normally be. And writing this I realise I sound like an ungrateful spoiled brat, because I spent an amazing ten days in Italy, but I did that while having a foggy brain. I enjoyed it. I loved it. Because I had a program to my days, and thus a structure I could follow. But some of my memories (luckily not all) from the trip are very hazy because of a combination of brain fog and suppressing trauma.

I’m okay now. Well, on most days I am. I’m not the okayest I’ve ever been, but I’m getting there again. Some days are still hard but I realized that my main problem is that I absolutely suck at prioritizing myself so that’s what I’m learning to do now, I’m learning to take care of me and not feel guilty about it, about not being able to be there for everyone all the time, not being able to put up reviews on time, to keep up with anything. I’m learning to be okay with not being okay and to get myself back to a place where I am okay.

I didn’t wanna make this a fully non-bookish post and eventhough I was in a weird slumping mood, I still managed to read 8 books in July and August (the ones I read in June are in the wrap-up). I only read 3 in July, one of which was a novella and 5 in August, 4 of which were in the second half of the month as I finally got out of that slump. so YAY!!! Here are said books in the order in which I read them:

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I’m also currently rereading my favourite book of all time The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo (here’s my review, and GO READ IT PLEASE!!!) I’m going back to school and hospital rotations on the 10th, so life should be going back to normal and I’ll be going back to my normal three posts a week schedule starting this week! I’m also gonna be slowly replying to comments over the next few days as well as catching up on other blogs.

If you made it this far, thank you for reading ❤ !


That’s it until next time.

Hope you enjoyed, write to you soon.

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WORD WONDERS’ TBR EXPANSION : Books with Depression representation

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Hello friends !

For this month’s recommendations I chose Books with Depression representation. There was no mystical reasoning behind it, I just thought that there isn’t enough mental health talk and featuring more books with it -centering it or not. I already did Anxiety and I’m slowly making my way but let me tell you, this list was way harder to gather than I originally anticipated. Depression in books isn’t that common to begin with and a lot of books seem to go about it the wrong way so actually finding some that are good was quite the struggle, not gonna lie. And even then, the number of books I was able to find isn’t that impressive.

I will try to include content warnings for as many of them. The ones that I couldn’t find content warnings for will have a (*) in front of their titles.

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WORD WONDERS’ TBR EXPANSION : Book with Anxiety representation

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Hello guys !

A whole month has gone by and it’s time again for a recommendations’ list and this month’s isn’t as extensive as the previous ones and definitely not as extensive as I would’ve wanted it to be. This month’s theme is Books with Anxiety representation because October 10th was Mental Health Awarness and even though I’m a few days late that’s what sparked this post. And while researching for it, aside from the fact that anxiety rep is severely lacking as a whole (which I expected but still surprised me) I came to two realizations:

  1. Anxious POC are almost inexistant in books.
  2. Anxiety in SFF doesn’t exist either.

I will try to include content warnings for as many of them. The ones that I couldn’t find content warnings for will have a (*) in front of their titles. Continue reading

#DiverseBookbloggersDiscuss: When Depression rep does more harm than good

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Hello guys !

CW: Depression, self-harm

Depression sucks.

I think everyone who has ever suffered from it will agree with me here. Depression really, really sucks. In fact, all mental illnesses suck but as someone who deals with depression, I’m especially familiar with it and the representation it receives in media.
And to be honest, I rather hate it. Continue reading